I’m often envious of my friend the crow
Who has the ability to fly away and escape into the sky
Even though I am collapsing
Even though I am losing the battle within myself
Even though I am falling into the void of nothing
I would do anything to see you smile
And protect you in anyway that I can
That is a degree of love that no one can fully comprehend
If I were to disappear..the people I care about…their lives…
I’m sure would just continue on almost like nothing happened at all…
I would be just another collection of useless memories to be forgotten from their brains..
I can feel the happiness radiating off of you
I see your smile and laugh
So why would I even bother to tell you my world is collapsing in on itself
Sometimes I wish I could just change into a wolf and run
Away from all the depression being a human brings
My muscles hurt
My stomach feels like there are needles in it…
My head Is throbbing
My eyes feel tired and sore
And my heart hurts because I just woke up from the best dream..
You were in it and not only did you talk to me like we use to for hours and hours
But You were happy…like genuinely happy
And you wanted to talk to me and try to make me smile..
I woke up smiling but in the world that doesn’t want me around..
Oh how I wish that dream was real
Do you not want to speak to me is that it ?
Do you not want me anywhere around you to?
Do you not want my name to be brought up in your presence?
Do you not want to communicate with me at all?
Do you want me to cease to exist for you?
I’m so tired now…..
I don’t have the strength to fight anymore …
Even you have given up on me..
The other voices are winning…
To the Guillotine I go..
I suppose you think it’s fine to ignore me
But it hurts more then you could ever know
Especially because its you…
It feels like I’m wasting my time
And wasting my breath